obsessed and need sleep

so yesterday I get off work, go home and start reading.  about 630+ pages and HOURS later, I finally went to bed and fell asleep somewhere around 3am.

what in the heck was I thinking???

well, I was totally engrossed in Eclipse.  then couldn’t help myself and read 1 1/2 chapters of Breaking Dawn. The word ‘obsessed’ comes to mind :/

today I’m a mess.  I’m numb, not just emotionally like I was talking about yesterday, but physically.  SO stinking tired!  and it’s all my own fault!  stupid, stupid girl

I really shouldn’t let myself do things like that.  My defenses are down.  Fighting the good fight of faith is hard enough w/o sleep deprivation!  I’m so emotional, more than usual.  And there’s a short trip between being being slaphappy, numb, then bitchy…  currently at numb, good thing I get to go home and not do anything tonight.  Well, there are about 600 pages for me to read…

we’ll see how long I last.  unless of course I go home and nap, then finish it later tonight.  but that will just make tomorrow even worse.  I’m so not gifted in self-control!

But here’s my revelation for today… I’m sure there’s some psychological word for it, but I really get into the characters of books, TV shows and movies.  I get so wrapped up in their lives, I can’t just watch or read, then walk away and not have the emotions follow.  It’s weird.  And this isn’t the first time I’ve realized it, just the first time I’m ‘talking’ about it.  1 episode, or 1 OK book, and I’m good.  Get me engrossed in a series, and I’m done.  The line between reality and fiction blurs.  I need help, I know. 🙂

Now, if I could just do this with the Bible……. stupid flesh :-/

Published by tammyk777

I want to be as open as possible, safely anyway. If I've been set free in something, maybe I can encourage someone else to seek God and they can be free too!

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