In the meantime

Inspired by a pretty cool blog by a girl named Emily.

I think I’ve touched on this subject before, right?  No, I know I have, but it’s been awhile, right?

The subject of being single.

Even if I have, too bad, I feel like talking about it again.  It’s my blog, right?

So, if you haven’t heard I’m single.  Very single, like haven’t dated in over 14 years.  That makes me weird doesn’t it?  Hmm, not much I can do to change that, it is what it is.  Would I like to change it going forward?  Sure, I guess.  I’m supposed to think that way anyway, right?

I don’t hear it very often, but I still hear things like there’s someone out there for me, etc.  Why don’t I try other churches or something?  Why don’t I find other singles’ groups?  Stuff like that.  Honestly, I don’t want to.  Maybe I’m just scared, maybe I think I heard God say that the guy would find me.

No, wait, I’m certain God said that.  My guy would find me, doing my day-to-day responsibilities.  Like Rebecca in the Old Testament.  He said it to me, I just wish others understood.

I don’t remember asking for patience in this area, but apparently I need it. 

In the meantime, I’m still a whole person.  In the meantime, I still have a calling on my life.  In the meantime, I’m still living.  In the meantime, I’m not waiting for my life to start.

What if I never get married?  I have pondered this many times.  You know what?  It’ll be OK.  No really, it will.

It will be OK if I do though.  It won’t fix anything though.  Not that anything needs fixing either.

In the meantime, I’m still an artist.  In the meantime, I’m still a loyal friend.  In the meantime, I’m still a missionary.  In the meantime, I love being an honorary aunt.

Maybe I don’t want children either.  No really, it’s OK for me to say that.

You might think I’m trying to convince myself of these things.  I’m not.  I already believe them.  I’m talking to those voices that say I’m not a whole person, that my calling won’t be fulfilled until I’m hitched, that the end-all of being a woman is being a wife & mom.

My identity is wrapped up in the fact that I’m a Christian.  Nothing else.  His will for my life is to share His love, to share the Good News that Jesus died for our sins, and by trusting in Jesus, we can spend eternity in Heaven. 

If that, spreading the news of redemption from hell into an amazing eternity in Heaven because of what Jesus did, is all I ever do on this Earth, I’ll be happy.  If the only wedding I’m in is the one where I’m joined with Jesus for eternity is all I get, honestly, I wouldn’t ask for more.

How about you?  What matters to you?  Does it matter in the end anyway?

Just saying…

PS – if you’ve ever said any of these things to me, please don’t get offended.  I appreciate that you only want the best for me 🙂  ♥